315 – I Refuse to Forgive Myself Because…

I won’t forgive myself because I have nothing to be sorry for. I never have. I deserve forgiveness, but I don’t need it. I’m living and trying to do the best I can.

What else can be asked of a human?

I need no forgiveness. I only need acceptance.

Thank you for reading and please check out my current books and free downloads:

The Heart and the Kraken

Never bring fingers to a tooth fight.

Tree Leaves in Wolf’s Maw: Poetry, philosophy, photography

Static: Prelude to Evolution: Mental illness and recovery

30 Day Motivation Building Challenge:

Project KindHeart Poster:

Coffin Dance:

Gratitude 30 Day Challenge

How To Like yourself Right Now

The person under the most scrutiny from our judgmental, harsh human brains tends to be – our own selves. I am my toughest, most persistent critic and I’m sure many others can relate to this. How could we ever be happy and content with an overly critical voice constantly screaming insults throughout the day? It is difficult, that’s for certain.

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What can we do about this critic from within? How can we silence it and create a new, more positive voice? Having a compassionate, benevolent voice in your own head takes practice, but it’s very possible if you take the time to reshape your thoughts.

1 – Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend.

Sometimes the way we speak to ourselves is absolutely cruel and unnecessary. Think of how you talk to a friend when he/she is in need versus the way you speak to yourself in difficult times. The responses are likely completely on opposite sides of the spectrum. Harsh words to yourself like, “You look ugly,” “You’re so stupid,” and “You should just give up,” are all too common. How often to do say this to a friend? Probably never. If you find yourself being overly-critical of the way you look, your habits, your words, etc., take a minute to calm down and talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend. Say things like, “You look fine,” “You’re just having a rough day,” and, “You can do this.”

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Would you personally hang out with a person who threw out degrading comments all day? If not, then you shouldn’t have to put up with it from yourself either. Make a conscious effort to swap up that inner self talk and add in tons of tenderhearted statements.

2 – Talk to yourself like you would talk to a child or a pet.

Here I’m referring that embarrassing, high pitched, baby-like talk that you give your kids and animals. We all have our own personal pet/child language, but they all have the same underlying message of “I love you with all my heart.” Go all in and spend five minutes in front of a mirror throwing out your most cheesy, childish compliments to yourself. “You’re so adorable, I love you, you are amazing and awesome, you’re so smart, I’m so glad you’re in my life!”

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You deserve as much love as the cute kitty above. No holding back – it will feel terribly awkward and uncomfortable – but it will help you engrave more positive thoughts into your brain. And it will make you smile as well.

3 – Spend time with yourself.

Quality self-time is sure to open your eyes to the awesome person within. It’s great to be around others, but sometimes it’s necessary to hang out alone with your own thoughts. This quiet time alone is often something most people avoid – because it can be uncomfortable at first. In today’s world, we’re surrounded by stimulation to silence our inner voices. Social media, texting, talking with others, working too much – all of these serve as distractions from our thoughts. It can be scary to plan time away from the loudness.

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Journal, take a long walk, go see a movie alone – the possibilities for a date with yourself are endless, and will not be as bad as you might think. Once you take the time to slow down and get to know who you really are, deep down, you will start to think, “Hey, I kind of like this person.” You also might surprise yourself.

4 – Say and repeat affirmations, in a mirror, at least twice per day.

Affirmations are awkward – it’s the truth. But they do grow less and less awkward with time and practice. And after awhile – you’ll even find yourself speaking those corny affirmations inside your head each time you see your own reflection. The first time I tried to speak a short list of affirmations in the mirror, I couldn’t. I stood there and stared at myself and started crying. I physically could not get the words to leave my throat. But I tried, everyday, morning and night. And then one day, one single affirmation came out. That’s all I managed that day, but it was a huge milestone for me. Work at it and create your own personal list of affirmations based on what your insecurities and sensitive spots are. Read that list out loud and in front of your reflection everyday and you will start to believe the words on the list.

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Here are some of my personal affirmations as an example:

I’m a good person

I am enough

I am good enough

I’m proud of myself

I love my body

My body is strong

I am smart

I am creative

I am kind

My smile can make others smile

I love who I am

I am unique

If you are tired of talking to yourself with hatred and condemnation, please give the items in this post a try. Give it time, and your self talk will grow positive and uplifting. Thank you for reading this post and please know that you deserve to be treated with kindness from everyone – especially yourself.


Thank you for reading this post and I hope you are kind to yourself today.

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This is Why You Deserve Happiness

Awhile ago I realized that the friends, pets, and family I felt I loved, truly, deep down into my soul – I loved for no specific reasons at all. I loved them just because they simply existed.

It wasn’t love because they looked a certain way, acted a certain way, or had anything in common with me. It was love simply because they were present and warmed my soul.

Many of us feel that we have to earn our love and value from those we seek it from. But true love doesn’t really rely on how we are – is exists because we are. 

Each and every individual on this planet deserves love and kindness just for existing – without having to prove him/herself, without having to start a career, and without having to look a certain way.

I would like to spread this message and personally say, “Thank you for existing,” to each and every person on this planet. 

For the world we live in, it’s hard to feel this way because there are so many lies that tell us all we must act and be a specific type of person in order to be happy and discover love. So if you are reading this, thank you so much for existing in this world. And keep existing for as long as life allows you. You deserve to be happy and you deserve love as you are right now.

Thank you for reading, and please take the time to tell those you love, “Thank you for existing.”

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This is Why You Should Keep a Journal

There are many good habits to take advantage of in order to make more out of life, and journaling is one of them. Here are 12 reasons why everyone, regardless of age, gender, social status, etc. – should keep a journal:

1 – Journaling forces us to slow down for a minute.

We live in a very fast paced society. Many days can pass us by before we even realize it’s actually been many weeks. Writing in a journal will force you to take a moment to slow down and realize what’s going on around.

2 – Journaling is a safe place to vent.

Every person on this planet could use a healthy outlet to vent and release strong emotions. Write it out, get it out of your brain and onto a sheet of paper so your mind can relax.

3 – Journaling helps you to enjoy special moments more by reliving the events as you write, and by having a record of milestones in life.

Writing down special moments, recording each detail as you remember it and how it made you feel will help you to cherish the moment even more. It goes back to slowing down and really dissecting the milestones you experience in life.

4 – Journaling is free.

All these benefits to offer and guess what? It’s free. Well, you might have to pay $2 for a composition notebook. But other than that, the positive effects of journaling are far too great to pass up.

5 – Journaling helps keep feelings in check.

Being overemotional is never a fun experience. Even being overly excited or joyful can lead to poor decisions. Journaling provides a release of those powerful emotions as it takes you away from the situation for a moment to settle down and vent simultaneously.

6 – Journaling helps you reflect on life in general.

Are you satisfied with the way your life is going? A journal gives you a firsthand account, in your own words, of your life. Reflect over the previous pages and ask yourself if you are living the way you’d like to be living.

7 – Journaling will take you away from social media for a few moments.

Social media can be very destructive. Put your phone aside for a bit and focus solely on your journal in front of you.

8 – Journaling helps you spot unhealthy or healthy patterns in your life.

If you are feeling low, physically or emotionally, look back through the pages of the journal you’ve been keeping and search for patterns. Did you eat out a lot? Did friends cancel plans multiple times? Thumb through the pages and find the consistencies and/or inconsistencies.

9 – Journaling will help you figure things out.

Jotting down ideas and brainstorming are great ways to figure issues out by exploring all the potential solutions. Journaling tends to be a form of this – sporadically writing down thoughts until finally something falls into place.

10 – Journals can be fun to look back on.

Similar to a photo album, old journals can be entertaining to look through years after they’ve been written. Laugh, cry, reminisce – you’ll be glad you wrote when you did because re-reading the pages will feel like re-living the moment.

11 – Journaling will keep your brain active.

Writing, reading, and planning what to write – all serve to keep the brain active and running. Neurons fire as you scribble down each sentence onto the page.

12 – Journaling will keep you grounded.

This point, in a way, ties everything together. Keeping a journal and writing in it daily will overall help you stay in check with your mind, body, emotions, habits, milestones, and anything else in your life that affects your wellness.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope this has convinced you to start keeping a journal. If you already do, awesome. We have something in common. 🙂 Have a great day!

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